Incredible Kids

So, my kids are just the most incredible little things ever!

First Raelin. No, first some background. I'm taking the most wonderful class in the world right now. It's called Moral Foundations and it's the missing puzzle piece to my skills-based education. This is the class that answers the one question the other classes could never answer: "HOW?" The other classes have taught all these skills--the what--but they could never tell me how to implement them. This class does just that. I'm learning about "the box." If you're in the box, you see yourself as the victim, you blame, justify, rationalize, excuse, take offense, and fail to answer moral calls (things you feel it would be right to do). If you are out of the box, you are an agent (able to make choices), you feel sorrow and compassion for others, you see your own role in a situation or problem, and you act responsively. When you are out of the box you see others as people with fundamental needs, wants, ambitions, etc., but when you are in the box you see them as objects, impediments, or means to an end. So the goal is to be out of the box as much as possible. How? By being willing. You have to be willing to let go of pride (in my case) or whatever it is that's keeping you in the box. You can't think yourself out, talk yourself out, or decide to get out. You just have to be truly willing to get out of the box. And then you find yourself out, not really knowing what you did to get there (because you didn't do anything; you changed your way of being).

Okay. Raelin. I've talked about this box concept with a couple of people lately--I think it's fascinating and it has truly changed me. Apparently, Raelin understands more of this than I would have thought--I wouldn't have thought she understood any of it, really. Today we were driving and Gina, Brice and I were talking about something about "the box" when she said, "Mommy, are we almost there, and are you in a box?" We all laughed (oops) and then Gina said that it was a figure of speech. Raelin said, "So, if you're out of the box, then you say when you're wrong?" Whoa. She got that? For me, being out of the box is being able to admit that I was wrong and take the blame that is mine and own it, then fix it. So we talked about it for a minute and I told her that she was right and that when we are out of the box, we can be wrong and it's good because then we can learn from it. She said, "So when we're out of the box it's okay to be wrong?" I said, "Yes, and it's even good because then we get to learn, even though it's hard to be wrong sometimes" She said, "Reading is hard for me, but it's okay for me to be wrong?" I said, "YES! Because then you get to learn!" We talked a little more about the idea and then she said, "Am I in a box?"

Now Ryker. Gina has been staying with us for the last few days and it has been great having her. The kids love to be with her and just think she's the best. She's also been a huge help during an otherwise impossible week. One night, Ryker asked if he could "cuddle up" with her to go to bed. She said yes so he got in bed and put Gina's flashlight on the floor on his side of the bed. Gina got in with him and said, "Ryker, can you hand me my flashlight?" He said, "Wow, you found it already!? I was hiding it from you, but you found it so fast! How did you know where it was?" Gina: "You left it on."

Oh, man, he cracks me up!

Finally, Alaina. She has been giving smiles to everyone even though she's sick and feels yucky. She's just great! I love having her around and I can't wait to be done with school just so I can hold her all day and not have to put her down or hope that she'll sleep for a while so I can write a paper or something.

One more. Brice. He is just the best husband ever. I love watching him be a daddy. He is so much fun for the kids and comes up with great games. He's willing to be silly and goofy for them and they love it. And I love watching him love Alaina. We are both so enamoured with her and I love to watch that sweet side of him come out when he cuddles her and when she smiles for him. And for me, he is everything. He helps me keep tabs on "my box," by reminding me when he hears me blame or be the victim, but mostly by inviting me out of the box by being out of the box himself. He is so good at seeing people as people and giving them the benefit of the doubt. It rubs off on me. He also makes me feel loved and adored. I trust him with my deepest, darkest secrets and I can bare my soul to him. I've never been so comfortable with someone in my life. I've never been loved so unconditionally or so completely. He puts up with my weaknesses (especially my pridefulness) and helps me to overcome them. He listens to me jabber endlessly about "the box" and other such nonsense. He helps me to be good and to try harder at everything I do. He encourages me. I love him with all my heart and soul and I am thankful every day for the gospel plan of eternal marriage because there would be no heaven for me without him.

Life is good!