Wednesday, January 21, 2009

From the mom's perspective

So, you got Brice's side of the story, but I want to tell mine too. Plus, it's an excuse for showing off more pictures.

Here's the story:

I was miserably pregnant and hated moving, sleeping, walking, breathing, reaching, twisting, and bending. What else is there left to do? Okay, so it wasn't that bad; I just hated it! I really wanted that baby OUT. And I think she wanted out too. Like Brice said, I started getting woken up at 1:00 in the morning on Friday with contractions, but by the time we were up and ready, they were gone. Boohoo. I was irritated and had already taken care of my school stuff so I could miss class. So we decided to go DO something to try to get things going again. We went to the mall and walked forever and ever and my aunt Kyle... Wait, my aunt Kyle. She came all the way out here from northern California--a 12 hour drive--because I asked her to come and be my advocate at the hospital. With my other kids, I had things I wanted done a certain way, but never the time to explain them or a birth plan to tell them. Brice doesn't like to get confrontational, but after Ryker's birth experience where they didn't believe us that I was in labor and wouldn't do anything but hook me up to machines until I was dilated to a 9, I wanted someone that would get in their face and get things done MY way (selfish? Me? Well, maybe a little). So Kyle came out and it was a good thing she did! But I'll get to that part. Anyway, Kyle knows lots about herbs and homeopathic stuff and things like that, so we went to the health food store and she got the pill that Brice mentioned which is a homeopathic medicine that is used for menstrual cramps, but also gets labor going if it is on its way already. You put a couple little balls of it under your tongue to let them dissolve. So we walked the mall until the kids were beat and then we sent them home to sleep and my mom, Kyle, and I went to the other mall to walk some more. We finally gave up when we weren't really making any progress and finished out the day at home with nothing to report.

Saturday morning, I got woken up again in the middle of the night with contractions that had a new and rather uncomfortable quality to them. I guess, for some background, I'll tell you that I had read up on hypnobirthing (it's more like deep meditation and relaxation than hypnosis and you do it for yourself--no one hypnotizes you) and hoped to be able to use some of the techniques I'd learned to reduce, if not eradicate, the pain. Anyway, I was trying to concentrate on letting the right things open and relax and allowing the right muscles to contract and push the baby down. But it got harder and harder to concentrate and stay so focused as the contractions got stronger. We left for the hospital at about 3:45 or so and got there around 4:00 in the morning. Being the rebellious rule-breaker that I am, they had to call my doctor to get the okay on a bunch of the stuff I wanted. I did NOT want continuous monitoring, so they had to get an order on that. The nurse looked at me funny when I said I wasn't wearing their gown--I'd brought a robe and a sports bra instead. And that was SO much better! I highly recommend opting out of their labor and delivery attire. I also didn't want an IV but had agreed to let them do a hep block instead (my doctor was so accomodating that I had to give her that one request). That thing was SO annoying! Brice kept laughing at me because I kept complaining about that thing but not about the contractions. Anyway, when the nurse checked me I was only at a 4 and I was perturbed, to say the least. I did not want to be in the hospital laboring for 6 more hours, which was my estimate based on how long it had taken to even go into labor. The nurse called my doctor to report and my doctor offered to come break my water to speed things along. Please do! Anything to get this overwith! Then we walked the halls and I tried to prepare for a lot of waiting. I didn't have to wait long, fortunately--I think I would have gone crazy. The nurse was funny; she said to hurry up because her shift ended at 6:00 and she wanted to witness an unmedicated birth without any screaming. I think she was convinced that I could do it when she checked me at one point and I was having a contraction, but chatting with her and Brice and Kyle at the same time. Her eyes got kinda wide and she said, "Are you having a contraction right now?" Unfortunately, she missed it by an hour. That last hour is the worst part. The contractions hit a level of pain unlike anything anything else you can experience. For me, anyway. It makes me shake and I wouln't be surprised if I was in shock. But it's short--it didn't last the whole hour. And then I started to feel a new sensation, and my aunt could tell. She asked if she should get the doctor. That's when she had to get a little forceful with the nurse who was dragging her feet about it. I was so glad to have her there so Brice could just enjoy the experience (enjoy watching his wife suffer? What kind of husband does that?!) instead of having to be confrontational and demanding. So the doctor came and asked if I was "starting to feel pushy." Yup, that's what that feeling was. She got the bed set up for me how I wanted it so that I was upright and sort of squatting. A few minutes later she was in her green delivery suit and rushing Brice to get into his before the baby came. She coached Brice through catching and me through pushing so that I wouldn't tear and baby Alaina was born in a push and a half at 7:08, weighing 7 lbs 8 oz and measuring 20 inches long. Brice put her on my tummy and the doctor told him how to clamp the cord and cut it. I got to just hold her without feeling like they were rushing her off to be weighed and measured and all that. She didn't want to nurse right away, but she was alert and looking around for two hours after she was born. I had asked that they delay all shots, pokes, and the dreaded eye goop for as long as possible and it was really nice to look into clear baby eyes instead of squinty, goopy ones and to nurse a baby that could see me for the first time. We were in the delivery room for about an hour hanging out with our new baby and getting dressed (just me; everyone else was already dressed). Then we all went down to the nursery for baby's first bath. The nurses were shocked that I was there an hour after giving birth, but the pediatrician's reaction was priceless. He came in and looked at Brice and said, "You're Dad?" pretty much dismissing me. Brice nodded and the nurse said, "And this is Mom!" He looked at me and startled. He literally took a step backward. "You're MOM!? I thought maybe you were an aunt or something! But not MOM!" He and the nurse went back and forth for a minute about how not normal it was to have Mom in the nursery so quick, or ever for that matter. She never left us the whole time in the hospital and it was really cool to be with her always and not to have my baby returned to me with gashes and pokes and who knows what done to her. I never trusted that the nurses didn't give my babies a bottle or do something else I wouldn't have wanted done. But this time, I was there every step of the way and I knew everything that happened to her. I got to see her weighed and measured (with the other kids, that always took place sooner than I wanted and way across on the other side of an enormous room where I couldn't see) and I got to watch Brice hold her for the first time. He is such a sweet daddy and he just looked at that little baby with so much love and held her so gently. It was precious to watch. We stayed in the hospital for their 24 hour minimum and then had to wait several more hours for the doctors (Alaina's and mine) to come and check us and then for the one prescription I wanted (lanolin-type stuff so I don't die from nursing--that can be worse than delivery sometimes!) to come and then we finally went home at about noon on Sunday. Things have been smooth sailing since. Alaina is a very good baby. And I think she's just really happy to be out of the uterus. About as happy as I am to have her out. I don't think this is going to be a baby that takes to swaddling much. As soon as she was out she stretched out straight and spends most of her time that way. She's much less wiggly now, too.

So that's my story of Alaina's birth. We are all happy and healthy and getting into a normal routine. I have been recovering really well; so well, in fact, that I didn't even miss any school after delivery! I feel better now than I did while I was pregnant. Walking is SO much easier! It was a great birth experience and I am so happy with how everything turned out. I am grateful to my doctor for accomodating all my wishes (demands?) and making this such a great experience. We are also, of course, grateful for Alaina Katherine and the sweet spirit she brings into our home.

5 comments:

C Tam said...

Wow--I love to see how an educated, strong woman can make good choices and see them come to fruition. I'm so proud of you for being really well-prepared and knowing what you wanted out of this birth--and especially it sounds like having an advocate there is a necessity. Great story; thanks for sharing!

Sophia said...

Sounds like you guys had a great experience, she is beautiful and I love her name!! I am very excited to see how the no diaper thing works out so I will be checking for updates! I have a book that talks a lot about that! So good luck!!

A+W Somers said...

I'm soooooooooooo happy for your whole family. I bet the kids are cute as pie with little Alaina. Your story was great to read, sweet and unique. I can really see that that little girl has touched a tender spot in you and Brice-- it's really beautiful. With all my heart, congratulations and I love you!
Angel

Karly said...

Congrats! She is so beautiful! I love your story too. You are so tough and amazing, I want to be as amazing as you. And some good tips too, you'll have to caoch me through my first pregnancy. :) I can't wait to see your new little girl.

Laina said...

OMG she is just too precious!!!! Those pics are tender! And I'm really interested in this whole process that you did? Maybe you talked about it previously...so you did all natural? Yes? No screaming? Do tell!!!